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Location: Canada

Member Since: April 07, 2020

Matt Payne

Series

Go Help Yourself by Matt Payne

How do you find your way when every turn is wrought with terror and confusion? How can you find a relationship with God and the economy? Would you like to free yourself from the shackles of your own weakness? Put behind your old life and step into the never-ending future with all my amazing books of TRANSFORMATION!!!

So You're Stuck in a Murder Mystery

Price: $1.99 USD.

Ten Ways To Make Money Fast

Price: $1.99 USD.

The Profit

Price: $1.99 USD.

Books

The Adventure Poem of Julius Cinnamon by Matt Payne

Price: $4.99 USD. Words: 61,920. Language: Canadian English. Published: July 29, 2017 by pattmayne. Categories: Fiction » Adventure » Action, Fiction » Science fiction » Adventure

Assaulted by petty peers, his empire cannibalized from within, Julius Cinnamon must find out who seeks the destruction of his wondrous Agartha. He has a lust for life and a plan that could change the world. His sense of loyalty is matched only by his capacity for revenge. Jump into an unprecedented adventure story.

Ten Ways To Make Money Fast by Matt Payne

Series: Go Help Yourself. Price: $1.99 USD. Words: 2,430. Language: English. Published: July 8, 2016 by pattmayne. Categories: Fiction » Humor & comedy » Satire, Nonfiction » Self-improvement » Personal Growth / Success

Everybody needs money, but not everybody is as smart as you. More importantly, not everybody has this scientifically-normalized "How-To-Guide" for step-by-step money-making. Mathematically, there are steps you can take to actually make more money. Leave your poor friends behind and say hello to your rich friends because you're (honestly) probably going to start making a lot of money really soon.

So You're Stuck in a Murder Mystery by Matt Payne

Series: Go Help Yourself. Price: $1.99 USD. Words: 3,110. Language: English. Published: July 8, 2016 by pattmayne. Categories: Fiction » Mystery & detective » Amateur sleuth, Nonfiction » Self-improvement » Time Management

Life is full of horrible surprises. And if you ever find yourself trapped in a mansion with your friends getting butchered by an unidentified maniac, you'll have no idea how to respond. This step-by-step how-to guide will make it easy for even the stupidest idiot to maneuver through such an unfolding crime, and to deal with the legal process that will inevitably follow.

The Profit by Matt Payne

Series: Go Help Yourself. Price: $1.99 USD. Words: 3,210. Language: English. Published: July 7, 2016 by pattmayne. Categories: Fiction » Humor & comedy » Satire, Nonfiction » Self-improvement » Motivation & inspiration

These short fables by self-proclaimed guru Matt Payne describe how we can all transform our lives by earning more profits. The fancy language and amoral tone will delight even the winniest of clyptics.

The Paranoid Adventures of Larry Grank by Matt Payne

Price: $3.00 USD. Words: 21,230. Language: English. Published: July 5, 2014 by pattmayne. Categories: Fiction » Humor & comedy » Black comedy, Fiction » Horror » Occult

The universe is full of mystery and Larry has the inside scoop. In this collection Larry uncovers secrets about multiple antichrists, alien conspiracies, the Liquid Cult, Jewish people, and exorcism.

Robot God / Hybrid Brain by Matt Payne

Price: $4.99 USD. Words: 25,000. Language: English. Published: March 25, 2014 by pattmayne. Categories: Fiction » Science fiction » Cyberpunk, Fiction » Science fiction » Short stories

Tten mind-bending science fiction stories. Ranging from theory fiction to action/adventure, these surreal, psychedelic tales will stretch your perspective and squeeze your heart.

Sick Book of Lies by Matt Payne

Price: $3.00 USD. Words: 29,270. Language: English. Published: January 22, 2014 by pattmayne. Categories: Fiction » Humor & comedy » Black comedy, Fiction » Themes & motifs » Spiritual & metaphysical

A gruesome grimoire of hilarious anecdotes, wonderful tales, impossible bullshit, and good advice. As well as sorcery, spiritual insight, get-rich-quick schemes, and ancient wisdom. Pretty much x-rated.

Matt Payne's tag cloud

absurd adventures astrology baby angels billionaire black humour bond conspiracy corruption detective diy home security diy law douglas adams egyptology evil experimental finance finance a new baby get rich quick god intense islam legal advice libertarianism lynchian making money millionaire money monty python most interesting man in the world murder murder mystery new life occult oligarchy playboy hero post human sarcastic cunt satan satire satire and religion self improvement sex sleuth spy surreal surreal absurdist the prophet transhuman trippy unreliable narrator violent action whodunit