M T McGuire

Biography

Hello

I'm M T McGuire. I grew up on a windy down but now I live in Bury St Edmunds, in Suffolk with my partner, our son and a large hairy cat. (You thought I was going to say 'pussy' didn't you?).

I check all unfamiliar wardrobes for a gateway to Narnia but am disappoined to report that I haven't found one yet. When I do, you'll be the first to know.

If you like comic fantasy fiction you may like my novel Few Are Chosen which is out now as an e-book and a paperback.

If you'd rather look at something you don't need to pay for, there are four free shorts which I hope you'll enjoy and a large chunk of Few Are Chosen, to boot.

Cheers

MTG

Where to find M T McGuire online


Where to buy in print


Books

Looking For Trouble, K'Barthan Trilogy: Part 4
By
Series: K'Barthan, Part 4. Price: $2.99 USD. Words: 144,520. Language: British English. Published: July 12, 2014. Category: Fiction » Science fiction » Adventure
Cornered ex-outlaw, with nowhere left to run, seeks miracle... The time has come for The Pan to face his demons and rectify the chaos he has caused. There’s a chance he can stop Lord Vernon and save K'Barth from destruction. But to succeed he has to keep his head down and maintain a low profile. He has to be brave and clever and stay in control. And he hasn’t a clue how to do any of it.
One Man: No Plan, K'Barthan Trilogy Part 3
By
Series: K'Barthan, Part 3. Price: $2.99 USD. Words: 120,740. Language: British English. Published: June 12, 2014. Category: Fiction » Science fiction » Adventure
Confused ex-outlaw, pardoned for all misdemeanours, seeks answers... The Pan of Hamgee has a chance to go straight but it's been so long that he's almost forgotten how. Bewilderingly, he's pardoned, given a business and a year's amnesty while he adjusts. But he doesn't have a year. In five days Lord Vernon will gain total power and the only one who can stop him is The Pan. A man without a plan.
The Wrong Stuff, K'Barthan Trilogy: Part 2
By
Series: K'Barthan, Part 2. Price: $2.99 USD. Words: 158,750. Language: British English. Published: March 19, 2012. Category: Fiction » Science fiction » Adventure
(5.00)
The Pan of Hamgee has escaped from police custody in K’Barth, switched realities and foiled Lord Vernon’s attempt to kidnap Ruth, the Chosen One from the Festival Hall. Now, to save her life The Pan must introduce Ruth, the woman of his dreams, to the person prophesied to be the man of hers. And he knows he must do it fast. Before Lord Vernon finds her. But can he bring himself to unite them?
Unlucky Dip
By
Series: K'Barthan, Prequel. Price: Free! Words: 7,040. Language: English. Published: January 15, 2011. Category: Fiction » Fantasy » General
(4.00)
The Pan of Hamgee, a starving outlaw, bumps into Big Merv; the meanest, scariest gangster in the City and without thinking what he is doing, steals his wallet. When Big Merv realises what has happened The Pan's future looks short. Unless he can persuade Big Merv to let him go he will be recycled into the Outer Ring Road, currently being constructed round the City. U certificate. 4,000 words.
Few Are Chosen, K'Barthan Trilogy: Part 1
By
Series: K'Barthan, Part 1. Price: Free! Words: 110,940. Language: British English. Published: September 17, 2010. Category: Fiction » Science fiction » Adventure
(4.67)
Charming outlaw with own transport and limited social skills seeks lucrative, employment at minimal risk. When you're running from a murderous government and work for an equally murderous gangster, accidentally torching his apartment is a bad move. The Pan of Hamgee just wants a quiet life. But it appears that destiny has other plans. "The Hitch Hiker's guide meets James Bond."
The Tale of Spam City
By
Price: Free! Words: 3,940. Language: English. Published: July 31, 2010. Category: Fiction » Fantasy » Short stories
Griselda, the Spam Eating Wench of Noop has never clapped eyes on a can of spam, let alone eaten any. If the situation becomes public knowledge her family faces social disgrace. But the world tinned-meat by product crisis is deepening and spam is thin on the ground. Only Griselda can save her family from ruin but can she find some spam before the truth gets out? British English, light swearing PG
They Came, They Saw, They Took the Tinfoil
By
Price: Free! Words: 3,070. Language: English. Published: May 13, 2010. Category: Fiction » Fantasy » Short stories
(4.00)
Gerry wakes up in in a bath full of cold water in her interview suit and best shoes. How did she get there? How did she sleep and why is there nothing aluminium left in the flat? Her flatmate Jane wants a shower, her other flatmate, Nina, is looking for her saucepans but Gerry... she just wants answers. British English, a bit of light swearing U/PG
Bog Man
By
Price: Free! Words: 5,860. Language: English. Published: March 13, 2010. Category: Fiction » Fantasy » Short stories
(4.00)
A perfectly preserved pre-historic cadaver is discovered in the fens and brought to a Museum. For the new Director it should present a major opportunity but is it real? And if it is, how come the pre-historic ring it's wearing also bears the marks of a local shop. And where is the Museum's Head Electrician? If the Director doesn't find answers soon the unthinkable may happen. He may look an idiot.
Is This Heaven?
By
Price: Free! Words: 5,170. Language: English. Published: December 8, 2009. Category: Fiction » Fantasy » General
(4.60)
Michaela Stevens has just died but, she wonders, can a gay lady get to heaven and if so, should it be like this? Should the heavenly host be that way? And is there a place in heaven for so many baked beans? Short story at about 4,500 words - no adult content but some light swearing so I'd rate it at a PG. British humour and spelling.

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Smashwords book reviews by M T McGuire

  • Farm Girl on Oct. 07, 2010

    I have difficulty giving this one a score, mainly because despite having read stories in a similar style I've never happened upon one which contains what the BBC archly describes as 'scenes of a sexual nature'. The writing style is light and the narrative voice one of a gentle soul. There's a lovely dry humour bubbling underneath the writing, too, which I enjoyed. Mr Porretto is clearly smiling as he types a lot of the time. He is also able to communicate a lot in a few words - a good example. 'The priest looked an avalance of questions at Allan, who did his best to maintain an expression of bland aimiability.' That one had me chuckling for some time. It is also clear that Mr Porretto likes the texture and sound of words, knitting them together with care and precision. Definitely the work of a craftsman this one. Farm Girl reads a little like a certain type magazine story, sweet even, so I immediately imagine my fellow readers as little old dears (not that many of the little old dears I know are internet savvy enough for e-book reading but you get the picture, I'm sure). Then we get a sex scene which would have my previously imagined readers chugging back the heart pills with builder-strength tea and going for a lie down. I can't make up my mind if the sex works or not, with my imagined blue rinse and hair net on it feels a little odd but that it may simply be down to my own unconscious genre-programming. Mr Porretto crams a lot of big ideas into a short space; love, trust, dealing with infertility, family values, doing the right thing (as opposed to the legal one) and these appealed to me. The ideas keep things zipping along but the reader doesn't quite get their teeth into any of them - although that is the nature of a short story. The moral of the tale is laid out for us at the end and I confess, I did find that off-putting, then again I'm British and we are a notoriously arsey bunch. I suspect that what might verge on talking down to us Brits, would be regarded by most other nations as helpful clarification. Certainly, I've noticed lot of American TV programmes do the same thing. I found I was thinking about Farm Girl after I'd read it - that's always a sign of good writing to me. Furthermore, Mr Porretto's writing skills are impressive and I will definitely be reading some more of his work on the back of this one. To me, that's another good sign. A personal 3 stars but I've upped it to 4 for the quality of the writing. In conclusion; Farm Girl didn't quite 'do it' for me but I am confident it will for many others.