Lenny Everson


List of Completed Works by Lenny Everson
(As of November, 2014, over 36,000 copies of Lenny's works have been downloaded.)
• Death On a Small, Dark Lake. 67,700 words. Our hero snags a body in a remote lake.
• Death on a Rocky Little Island 71,500 words. Our hero convinces a friend to take a canoeing trip to the 30,000 islands.
• Mount Moriah 50,000 words. A strange sequence events involves a priest, a poet, a CSIS agent, a space alien, four horny teens, among others. My most fun fiction.
• Last Exit to Pine Lake. 45,000 words. A dying writer goes back into the bush to off himself. Grimly literary. My best fiction.
• Ally Oop Through the Ulysses Trees. As much fun as Mount Moriah!
• Marley Was Dead: A Christmas Carol Mystery
• Granite and Dry Blood. 9,700 words. Our hero wants to write a book on Massassauga Park. Various people would prefer that he didn’t.
• Death on a Foggy Spring Portage. 11,800 words. One member of a paddling group is found dead on a muddy portage.

• Murder on a Foggy Spring Portage. One member of a paddling group is found dead on a muddy portage.

• Louis Riel and Gabriel Dumont. Ghosts of the two Métis leaders meet in today’s world to remember their lives. A short (20-minute) play for two actors.

Full-Length Poetry Books
• The Minor Odyssey of Lollie Heronfeathers Singer. A middle-aged woman tries to connect with her aboriginal ancestry.
• In The Tavern of Lost Souls. Four poets meet at a grungy bar once a month to give their poetic answers to random questions.
• Love in a Canoe. A set of five chapbooks and a songbook about the love of canoeing. With illustrations.
• Louis Riel and Gabriel Dumont are Dead. Ghosts of the two Métis leaders meet in today’s world to remember their lives. Includes the play.
Poetry Chapbooks
• Encounter in a Small, Old Cemetery. Autumn. Midnight. Poet visits a small, old private graveyard. Best poem I ever wrote.
• Fire and Ashes. Poems about life’s flames and regrets.
• The Empty Tarmac of a Long-Abandoned Airport. Poems about having a midlife crisis.
• Love Poems A compilation
• Pray for Me: 22 Poems Probably Slandering God and Jesus
• Ballads from an Unlucky Fisherman: Poems from a fisherman
• Tweetable Limericks. 60 limericks small enough to be tweets
• Hiking Poems.

Co-Authored Poetry Chapbooks
• Who Would Be a God? Susan Ioannou and Lenny debate the merits of being a god.
• How to Dance Naked in the Moonlight. Katherine L. Gordon (Celtic pagan) and Lenny (skeptic) confront the ceremony.
• Cats and Dogs. With I. B. Iskov
• For Ko Aye Aung: A Plea for His Release from Prison. For Amnesty International, with other poets.

Non-Fiction Chapbooks
• If You Condemn Gays: The Bible on Homosexuality and Other Items.
• The Architecture of Suburban West Kitchener. A light look at house styles.
• The Architecture of The University of Waterloo. A light look at the campus buildings.
• Making Tourist Attractions for Towns and Small Cities. Advice.
• Technological Solutions to Global Warming.
• Hyphens: A Guide for the Early Twenty-First Century.
• Colons and Semicolons: A Guide for the Early Twenty-First Century.
• How to Review Draft Technical Writings
• Rebecca’s Trail (Grand River Trail) in Winter
• 7 Temples to Bill Gates: a modern mystery
• The Great God Pan - or Not
• Two in a Tent: Camping Humor.
• Why Haven't Aliens Contacted us?

• Dance Songs for Weddings Available on Smashwords
• Canoe Songs. part of a set of six chapbooks about the love of canoeing. With illustrations.. Available on Smashwords
• 18 Dingbat Songs for Kids Available on Smashwords

I’d like to thank all the people who downloaded my writings. And I’d like to thank Smashwords for making them available to the world.
I started out as a poet, and spent most of my life producing poems. Some of them are really fine poems, but, of course, the monetary value of poetry in this world isn’t much. Actually, I once calculated poetry has a negative monetary value; poets are lucky if they don’t have to pay people to listen to them.
But I always admired people who told me they were “writing a novel.” I don’t know why, but I did. So eventually, I sat down and wrote a novel, just to show I could actually do it. The result was Death on a Small, Dark Lake, more than two thousand copies of which have been downloaded. It wasn’t really very good, but at least I could say, “I wrote a novel!” I stuck to what I knew best, canoeing and the lake country north of Peterborough, Ontario, the edge of Canada’s lake country.
I wrote Death on a Rocky Little Island in an effort to make some more believable characters, but I can’t really say I succeeded. People have downloaded a few more copies of that, so maybe it was a bit better constructed than the first novel. It included canoes, of course.
Then one of my friends taunted me into doing something for NaNoWriMo, the endeavor in which a person tries to write a 50,000-word novel in the month of November. I was, er, a few days over, but I got it done. It turned out to be a bit incoherent in spots, but in general, a lot of fun; I recommend it, if your standards aren’t too high. And there are no canoes in it.
By that time, I figured I could write something “literary.” The result – with more canoes of course – was Last Exit to Pine Lake. If it’s less fun, well, it’s meant to be. If most people don’t like it, well, that’s normal for literary novels, so it doesn’t bother me.
My literary bent done, I wrote Ally Oop Through the Ulysses Trees. It was intended to be fun, and it’s lots better than the first two novels I wrote. I even put myself, in a canoe, as a minor character.
Then I thought I’d just write a novel that would sell. For money, like. Smashwords said romance generally sold well, so I wrote Fire and Spark, under the name, “Laura Singer.” (You can search for it.) It wasn’t all that bad, for a guy’s first romance novel. Really, it is, although my wife said it should be subtitled, Five Canoes; No Sex. I again added myself as a minor character. But it didn’t sell, so I added it to my list of free books on Smashwords. You’re welcome.
Last fall, I finished another book that I thought would actually sell, Marley Was Dead: A Christmas Carol Mystery. My wife thought it was really good, mostly because of the historical details of social life. It didn’t sell, of course, so it’s free now. You’re welcome, again.
As for the poetry, the most popular are Hiking Poems and 21 Poems for Love, Weddings, and Anniversaries.
And then there’s the rest. The opinion pieces are just my explorations of things that I wanted to know more about. I studied the subject, briefly, and published my findings. They’re not scholarly, but well worth what you’ll pay for them. A few are getting outdated, but nobody’s written to me to ask for updates.
If you want to learn more about any of my writings, email me at lennypoet@hotmail.ca.

Like Lenny’s poems? Just type in (or copy) the YouTube address) from any item on the list below into your search engine. You should get a YouTube video of Lenny reading a poem.

https://youtu.be/u0Bw6xUcEFM n

Where to buy in print


Make Your Own Mystery Novel
Price: Free! Words: 2,940. Language: English. Published: November 5, 2017 . Categories: Essay » Literature, Fiction » Mystery & detective » Cozy
For people who want a quick and easy start to writing a novel or novella (for National Novel Writing Month, for example or impress that special someone), this provides a framework by using an Agatha Christie novel as a basis plot and characters. By keeping the plot premises and altering the rest, a difficult task is made easier.
Saint Grotesque of the Subway
Price: Free! Words: 13,450. Language: English. Published: September 7, 2017 . Categories: Fiction » Fantasy » Contemporary
(3.00 from 1 review)
A woman, and a man and with an indigo guitar, share a church basement sanctuary for a Toronto winter. These are their collected ideas.
A Modest Proposal for the Parliament of Canada
Price: Free! Words: 1,640. Language: English. Published: July 6, 2017 . Categories: Essay » Political
This short satirical work proposes that backbenchers be removed, benches and all, from the Canadian House of Commons, in the interests of modernity and efficiency for both the backbenchers and the rest of the House of Commons.
The Blue Guitar
Price: Free! Words: 1,770. Language: English. Published: June 21, 2017 . Categories: Poetry » Spiritual
The blue guitar, and the tunes played on it, are, in this collection of poems, symbolic of change. There are a myriad of changes in a person's life, and the blue guitar plays in the background to most of them. This is an interesting and reader-friendly collection, suitable for all ages.
Did Hamlet Love Ophelia?: and Other Thoughts on the Play
Price: Free! Words: 10,790. Language: English. Published: May 22, 2017 . Categories: Essay » Literature, Plays » Shakespeare
This is a collection of short essays on Shakespeare’s play, Hamlet. It includes analyses of the plot and characters as seen through more modern eyes than most essays. Topics in the 11 “thoughts” include an inquest into why Hamlet killed Claudius, as well as an essay, “The Great Poland Invasion Scam.”
Hamlet: The Comedy
Price: Free! Words: 135,260. Language: English. Published: February 28, 2017 . Categories: Fiction » Historical » Medieval, Plays » Shakespeare
Hamlet, the Comedy contains the events of Shakespeare’s famous play, but as seen through the eyes of Amundi, court jester at the time. Amundi and his companions try figure out the meaning of it all, and if, indeed, it has meaning. This, in a milieu of treachery, revenge, and threats of war.
An Insider's Guide to “Marley Was Dead”
Price: Free! Words: 3,820. Language: English. Published: September 11, 2015 . Categories: Nonfiction » Education & Study Guides » Study guides - English (insert language book was written in)
For people who have read the novel, Marley Was Dead, and have questions, this is a short, helpful guide. Marley Was Dead is linked to Dickens's A Christmas Carol, but the descriptions of mid-Victorian London are more fascinating than the mystery, This guide answers some questions about the sociology of the book.
Hiking Songs
Price: Free! Words: 2,360. Language: English. Published: August 16, 2015 . Categories: Nonfiction » Music » Folk
Here are a few songs for people who like hiking, and would like some songs to sing around the campfire. The lyrics are original, but the tunes are based on old folk songs, to make them easy to play on guitar or ukulele.
Marley Was Dead: A Christmas Carol Mystery
Price: Free! Words: 60,600. Language: English. Published: November 7, 2014 . Categories: Fiction » Mystery & detective » Historical
(4.33 from 3 reviews)
Walk the streets of old London just before Christmas with a retired police inspector haunted by the mysterious death of Jacob Marley. Meet the people he investigates, including Ebenezer Scrooge, Bob Cratchit, Fagin, and Bill Sikes.
In the Tavern of Lost Souls
Price: Free! Words: 22,630. Language: English. Published: May 22, 2014 . Categories: Poetry » Canadian Poetry
Four poets meet regularly in an old tavern, at the dark of the moon, to answer odd questions .
The Best Short Poem Ever Written?
Price: Free! Words: 1,460. Language: English. Published: March 4, 2014 . Categories: Poetry » Spiritual
“To Birches” has been praised as “perhaps the best short poem ever written.”
Mother Earth What a Life You've Had!
Price: Free! Words: 16,000. Language: English. Published: February 22, 2014 . Categories: Nonfiction » Science & Nature » Environment
(4.00 from 1 review)
This book summarizes most of the known hazards life on planet Earth has encountered since it began. These include volcanoes, comets, asteroids, and unknown causes of major and minor extinctions.
Ally Oop Through the Ulysses Trees
Price: Free! Words: 82,470. Language: English. Published: July 24, 2012 . Categories: Fiction » Science fiction » General
(4.00 from 2 reviews)
A comic tale of men and their complete inability to come to terms with the three most confusing things in their universe; women, politics, and space aliens.
Additional Lyrics for Some Old Songs
Price: Free! Words: 1,360. Language: English. Published: July 18, 2012 . Categories: Nonfiction » Music » Folk
These are additional or replacement lyrics for a few old songs.
The Minor Odyssey of Lollie Heronfeathers Singer
Price: Free! Words: 11,350. Language: English. Published: December 29, 2011 . Categories: Poetry » Canadian Poetry
A sequence of poems tells of a Toronto woman's search for her aboriginal and Métis roots.
Fine and Fierce and Free: Canoe Poems for Spring
Price: Free! Words: 1,510. Language: English. Published: December 16, 2011 . Categories: Poetry » Canadian Poetry
(4.00 from 1 review)
18 poems about canoeing in spring, about the joy of watching ice turn to snow and catching the flow of waters at their best.
No Ordinary Waters: Canoe Poems from a Strange Mind
Price: Free! Words: 1,750. Language: English. Published: December 15, 2011 . Categories: Poetry » Canadian Poetry
Eighteen odd poems about canoeing from a man whose mind goes beyond the waters he paddles.
Ten Very Short Poems
Price: Free! Words: 1,160. Language: English. Published: December 6, 2011 . Categories: Poetry » Canadian Poetry
(5.00 from 1 review)
Lenny Everson offers ten really short poems, especially for those who, like the author, a bit attention-deficit disordered.
My Ten Best Short Poems
Price: Free! Words: 1,500. Language: English. Published: December 6, 2011 . Categories: Poetry » Canadian Poetry
(5.00 from 1 review)
Lenny Everson offers his ten best short poems, for people with limited time and skeptical minds.
How to Dance Naked in the Moonlight
Price: Free! Words: 3,670. Language: English. Published: December 4, 2011 . Categories: Poetry » Canadian Poetry
(5.00 from 1 review)
22 poems about the ceremony of dancing naked in the moonlight.
Rebecca's Trail
Price: Free! Words: 4,420. Language: English. Published: December 3, 2011 . Categories: Nonfiction » Science & Nature » Nature
A nature guide for a section of Ontario's Grand River Trail.
Fireplace and Wine: 15 Canoe Poems for Winter
Price: Free! Words: 1,400. Language: English. Published: December 1, 2011 . Categories: Poetry » Canadian Poetry
Fifteen poems about canoeing (or at least thinking about it) in the middle of winter.
Why Haven't Aliens Contacted Us?
Price: Free! Words: 7,480. Language: English. Published: November 30, 2011 . Categories: Essay » Technology
This is a short discussion paper listing possible solutions to the question, "Why haven't alien civilizations contacted us?"
The Great God Pan - Or Not
Price: Free! Words: 1,780. Language: English. Published: October 12, 2011 . Categories: Nonfiction » Religion & Spirituality » Atheism/Agnosticism
(3.00 from 1 review)
A little booklet about Pan, the little god who cannot be, and his conflict with religion.
Semicolons and Colons: A Guide for the 21st Century
Price: Free! Words: 2,820. Language: English. Published: August 28, 2011 . Categories: Nonfiction » Reference » Grammar & punctuation
(5.00 from 3 reviews)
A short manual on the uses of colons and semicolons. Really, folks, it doesn't matter all that much, except to Grammar Nazis.
Canoe Songs
Price: Free! Words: 3,050. Language: English. Published: July 31, 2011 . Categories: Nonfiction » Music » Folk
This is a small book of thirteen songs for people who like canoeing. The lyrics are from Lenny's canoeing poems, and the tunes are from well-known folk songs. Guitar chords are provided and the tunes are easily available online. "A Summer Song," for example, uses the tune from "Battle Hymn of the Republic".
17 Dingbat Songs for Kids
Price: Free! Words: 3,160. Language: English. Published: July 30, 2011 . Categories: Nonfiction » Children's Books » Music
These new kids' songs are written to of old folk music tunes.
Dance Songs for Weddings
Price: Free! Words: 1,570. Language: English. Published: July 19, 2011 . Categories: Nonfiction » Music » Dance music
This is a small set of new songs to be used at wedding receptions when the newly married couple is dancing.
7 Temples to Bill Gates
Price: Free! Words: 6,190. Language: English. Published: June 22, 2011 . Categories: Nonfiction » Biography » Autobiographies & Memoirs
The story of a man who made seven temples dedicated to Bill Gates.
21 Poems for Love, Weddings, and Anniversaries
Price: Free! Words: 2,530. Language: English. Published: June 17, 2011 . Categories: Poetry » Contemporary Poetry
Some non-traditional poems for people in newly in love, still in love, or about to marry.
Louis Riel and Gabriel Dumont: A Short Play
Price: Free! Words: 3,230. Language: English. Published: June 16, 2011 . Categories: Screenplays » History
In this short play, the ghosts of the Métis leaders of the 1885 rebellion in Canada talk about their lives and deaths.
Tweetable Limericks
Price: Free! Words: 7,660. Language: English. Published: June 16, 2011 . Categories: Poetry » Contemporary Poetry
(4.50 from 2 reviews)
These are limericks that are short enough (less then 140 characters) to be sent as a Tweet on the Twitter application.
Hiking Poems
Price: Free! Words: 2,170. Language: English. Published: June 15, 2011 . Categories: Poetry » Canadian Poetry
Twenty-four poems about backpacks and thunderstorms, fine trails and swamps, and the joys of hiking.
The Empty Tarmac of a Long-Abandoned Airport: 23 Poems about Separation
Price: Free! Words: 1,930. Language: English. Published: June 14, 2011 . Categories: Poetry » Canadian Poetry
Poems for when the words stop and you start leaving footprints in the ashes.
What Last Golden River Run: 17 Canoe Poems for Autumn
Price: Free! Words: 2,760. Language: English. Published: June 14, 2011 . Categories: Poetry » Canadian Poetry
(4.00 from 1 review)
This booklet contains seventeen poems about the joy, wistfulness, and danger inherent in canoeing in autumn.
Cherish the Day: 16 Canoe Poems for Summer
Price: Free! Words: 2,520. Language: English. Published: June 14, 2011 . Categories: Poetry » Canadian Poetry
Sixteen poems about portages, thunderstorms, and long sunny days, the experience of canoeing in summer.
Two in a Tent: Camping Humor
Price: Free! Words: 2,610. Language: English. Published: June 2, 2011 . Categories: Fiction » Holiday » Humorous, Fiction » Humor & comedy » General
(4.00 from 1 review)
Two short pieces of humor about sharing a pup tent. Sharing a pup tent is a really silly idea sometimes.
Hyphens: A Guide for the 21st Century
Price: Free! Words: 5,240. Language: English. Published: May 24, 2011 . Categories: Nonfiction » Language Instruction » English as a second language
A short (and funny) manual on the uses of hyphens, with illustrations and commentary.
Last Exit to Pine Lake
Price: Free! Words: 41,360. Language: English. Published: May 3, 2011 . Categories: Fiction » Literature » Literary
A dying writer goes off into the woods to die in peace. So much for that idea.
Ballads from an Unlucky Fisherman
Price: Free! Words: 2,430. Language: English. Published: April 27, 2011 . Categories: Nonfiction » Sports & outdoor recreation » Fishing
(4.00 from 1 review)
Sixteen poems about fishing, from a very unlucky fisherman
Death on a Foggy Spring Portage
Price: Free! Words: 11,960. Language: English. Published: April 25, 2011 . Categories: Fiction » Mystery & detective » General
(4.50 from 2 reviews)
On an early spring canoe trip, our hero, Ted, finds the body of Hughie, drowned in a mudhole on the portage trail. Because the electronic organizer Hughie always carried is missing. Ted wonders if someone killed him.
Encounter in a Small Old Cemetery
Price: Free! Words: 1,780. Language: English. Published: April 22, 2011 . Categories: Poetry » Contemporary Poetry
(4.00 from 1 review)
A poem about a man visiting a small graveyard and coming away with more questions than answers
Technological Cures for Global Warming
Price: Free! Words: 10,420. Language: English. Published: April 22, 2011 . Categories: Nonfiction » Science & Nature » Ecology & Environment
(3.00 from 3 reviews)
A short no-nonsense guide to using technology to reverse climate change. Updated to August of 2012.
Death on a Rocky Little Island
Price: Free! Words: 71,390. Language: English. Published: April 18, 2011 . Categories: Fiction » Mystery & detective » General
(5.00 from 2 reviews)
Two guys canoe out among the 30,000 islands in Georgian Bay. It's supposed to be a guy weekend, but it turns out some of the locals don't want them there.
Death on a Small, Dark Lake
Price: Free! Words: 67,910. Language: English. Published: April 18, 2011 . Categories: Fiction » Mystery & detective » General
(3.00 from 1 review)
Win Szczedziwoj is a would- be escapee from society for a few days. Just him and his canoe. But his solitude comes to an abrupt end when his fishing line comes up with a boot - with a body still in it.
Granite and Dry Blood
Price: Free! Words: 10,410. Language: English. Published: April 17, 2011 . Categories: Fiction » Young adult or teen » Adventure
A short canoeing adventure set in Ontario's Massassauga Provincial Park. With canoes, a bear, a nuke, a B-52 and a guy with a gun. At less than 10,000 words, this is perfect for someone with limited time or a short attention span.
Mount Moriah
Price: Free! Words: 51,260. Language: English. Published: April 15, 2011 . Categories: Fiction » Thriller & suspense » General
(4.50 from 2 reviews)
A secret agent, two guys making bombs, a bunch of teenagers with sex on their minds, a couple of Navy SEALs, and a priest who has God speak to him down by the river. Not to mention the tree-covered pluton named Mount Moriah, of course.... A tender Ontario story.

Lenny Everson's tag cloud

1885 rebellion    aliens    aliens adventure    aliens among us    aliens and ufo    anniversary poems    artful dodger    asteroids    backbenchers    bass    bill gates    bitches    camping    canada    canadian literature fiction    canoeing    canoeing fiction    canoeing music    canoes    canoes and canoeing    canoes and canoeing poetry    canoes poetry    changes    childrens music    christianity    climate change    colons    comedy    comets    dance    despair poems    dinosaurs    divorce poems    environmental engineering    extinctions    fagin    fishing    fishing poetry    gates bill    geoengineering    georgian bay islands fiction    ghosts poetry    global warming    gods    government    grammar    grand river trail    hamlet    hamlet criticism    hamlet essays for students    hamlet novel    hiking and walking books    hiking poetry    humor    hyphens    ice fishing    kids music    life on earth    limericks    london 1800s    louis riel    love    love poems    marley    marley was dead    marriage poems    massassauga provincial park fiction    metis    moonlight    murder    music    mystery    nature    novels fiction    pan    play    poetry    poetry contemporary    poetry short    prose poems    reception    reincarnation    religion    saskatchewan    satire    scrooge    semicolons    senate    separation poems    seti    shakespearean    software    solar radiation management    song lyics    songs    temple    tenting    tweets    twitter    ufo fiction    victorian london    volcanoes    walleye    wedding    wedding poems    writing a book    writing how to    writing novels   

Smashwords book reviews by Lenny Everson

  • Guns, Fire, and Hoses on Oct. 07, 2016

    I enjoyed this book more than any I've read in a while. I especially liked the characters and would like to see them in a sequel.