Jordan Dumer


I'm a creative soul who lives and breathes fiction writing. I love great storytelling regardless of style and genre but always find myself leaning towards blending horror, mystery, comedy, fantasy and science fiction.

For Science Fiction fans, don't expect core science stuff. I'm not a scientist. I'm a Liberal Artist. I study literature, fine arts, acoustics, religion and ancient history. So I write more soft science fiction like Ray Bradbury. I don't really care about getting the science correct. I'm more interested in playing with concept and metaphor.

Smashwords Interview

What are your five favorite books, and why?
I don't really have a favorite of anything especially not when it comes to books. How can someone compare something like Shakespeare's Hamlet to Twain's The Adventures of Tom Sawyer? But I can name the five books that have been the most influential to my own style: John Steinbeck's The Grapes of Wrath, Dashiel Hammet's The Maltese Falcon, JRR Tolkien's The Hobbit, Ray Bradbury's Fahrenheit 451 and George Orwell's 1984.

The reason for these works influence is not just subject matter but the way they present it in third person perspective.
What do you read for pleasure?
I usually don't read for pleasure but for ideas but my best ideas usually come from the places that provide the most pleasure. That's why I read non-fiction on the subjects I love. For fiction, I usually read classics or something that catches my eye. I usually don't care about the genre or the medium as long as it's good.
Read more of this interview.

Where to find Jordan Dumer online


Stupid Smartphones
Comedy essays, jokes, poetry and short stories by fiction writer Jordan Dumer that centres around the absurdities and horrors of the digital Pandora's Box we carrying around with us every day.

Stupid Smartphones

Price: Free!

Red Flag

Price: Free!

The Glitch

Price: Free!

The Spiders Dark Web

Price: Free!
Future Follies
Collection of Short Stories, Essays, Poems, Jokes, and more on Technology and the future.

Stupid Smartphones

Price: Free!

The Future of Drugs

Price: $0.99 USD.
Road to Nowhere
Trilogy of Comedy Horror Novelletes that take place in rural Wisconsin.

The Witches Have Their Hour

Price: $0.99 USD.

The Book of Spells

Price: Free!


Spiral Circles
Price: Free! Words: 4,110. Language: English. Published: November 18, 2018. Categories: Fiction » Humor & comedy » Black comedy, Fiction » Horror » Occult
The CERN supercollider is a machine that charges tiny particles to the speed of sound, launching them into other tiny particles, and documenting the explosions. But what will happen when Dr. Laurel and Dr. Hardy are given the task to charge the particle to the speed of light? Will it destroy the world, and will our brave underpaid scientists be able to save the world from ourselves?
The Malware Before Christmas
Series: Stupid Smartphones. Price: Free! Words: 3,180. Language: English. Published: November 4, 2018. Categories: Fiction » Holiday » Christmas, Fiction » Humor & comedy » Black comedy
Santa's Elves create a Super Computer powerful enough to judge the difference between naughty and nice. And Santa, still tired from last Christmas, is willing to test it on Christmas Eve. Spoiler Alert. It does not end well in this Christmas Comedy for Adults.
The Maltese Codices
Price: Free! Words: 5,250. Language: English. Published: October 31, 2018. Categories: Fiction » Historical » Ancient, Fiction » Horror » Occult
It's 146 BC and a Maltesian Sailor is swept along the southwestern shore of the Mediterranean after a rogue wave sinks his vessel, and what he finds will haunt him the rest of his life. But what is this strange tale doing in the home of a late nineteenth-century magician? And are some mysterious simply better left unsolved?
Bleeding Eyes
Series: Stupid Smartphones. Price: Free! Words: 1,550. Language: English. Published: October 31, 2018. Categories: Fiction » Horror » Ghost, Fiction » Humor & comedy » Black comedy
It's New Years Eve 2019, and Mark and Susan Anthony are on their way to Jerusalem to visit the Old City. However, while on their way, they uncover an ancient legend, and learn the hard way, to never mock the Messiah in the Holy Land.
The Campfire Burns
Price: Free! Words: 3,800. Language: English. Published: October 7, 2018. Categories: Fiction » Horror » General, Fiction » Western
John Garrison, his wife Diana-Ray and infant son Timothy leave the chaos of Northern New York for the fringes of the Wild West in search of freedom and prosperity. But what they find is horror along the deep lush prairies of the Mid-West, horrors only found in the wild places of the American West where few men brave to tread.
Death Owns the Night
Price: Free! Words: 1,700. Language: English. Published: October 4, 2018. Categories: Fiction » Historical » Medieval, Fiction » Horror » General
Five Travellers, a Priest and his Assistant, a Knight and his Errant, and alone Plague Doctor are hiking along the Italian Alps to escape the Black Plague, but is it too late? And what will they find on the other side of the mountain? Learn this and more in this short story about facing life and escaping death, or is it the other way around?
Red Flag
Series: Stupid Smartphones. Price: Free! Words: 1,620. Language: English. Published: September 29, 2018. Categories: Fiction » Humor & comedy » Satire
A dirty satire about a reckless writer who writes a book so controversial that the Department of Homeland Security turns to Dr. Huey Pacard, Head Director of the Domestic Cyber Terrorism Unit, to stop him before his book causes a geopolitical inconvenience.
Series: Stupid Smartphones. You set the price! Words: 11,770. Language: English. Published: September 3, 2018. Categories: Fiction » Romance » Contemporary, Fiction » Horror » Weird fiction
Chet Paul's a young Classical Guitar Virtuoso who lives off the inheritance from his parents' tragic death. A loner, Chet feels awkward living alone in a world far different from the sheltered suburban life he was born in. So, he spends his days learning new songs on his acoustic guitar & working odd jobs to stay afloat financially. However, all of that changes when he meets the love of his life.
The Spiders Dark Web
Series: Stupid Smartphones. Price: Free! Words: 4,050. Language: English. Published: August 20, 2018. Categories: Fiction » Science fiction » Short stories, Fiction » Mystery & detective » Hard-Boiled
(3.00 from 1 review)
100 Years in the Future, the FBI cracks down hard on White Collar Crime and corruption. Detective Willard is assigned the task of looking into the transaction records of an obscure company. But after finding the web address to an archaic computer simulation, FBI Cheif Bernard Miller finds himself tangled in the dark corners of the Dark Web. Caught up in a web of power, will he make it out alive?
Nighttime Photography
Price: Free! Words: 2,410. Language: English. Published: August 13, 2018. Categories: Fiction » Horror » Occult
Areal Photographer from Rural Wisconsin finds more in the backwoods of the Kettle Moraine forest than just some good pictures for his homepage. He discovers something far more sinister with his drone. But will he live to tell about it?
A Brief History of Mishaps
Price: Free! Words: 3,430. Language: English. Published: August 12, 2018. Categories: Fiction » Humor & comedy » Black comedy, Fiction » Alternative history
A Collection of three short stories about sex, drugs and sharks. The first story is set in the past, the second in the modern world, and the third in an alternative future.
Mississippi River Queen
Series: Stupid Smartphones. Price: Free! Words: 3,290. Language: English. Published: June 17, 2018. Categories: Fiction » Horror » Ghost, Fiction » Horror » General
A divorced father fixes up a boat, and decides to go boating on a hot summer day with his son. On their way back, they see a light, and then their motor fails, and then the trouble happens. Learn what happens on that faithful summer night in this Short Horror Story.
The Glitch
Series: Stupid Smartphones. Price: Free! Words: 7,180. Language: English. Published: April 29, 2018. Categories: Fiction » Science fiction » Short stories, Fiction » Horror » Weird fiction
Francois is a hard worker with a dream of becoming a maverick in the field of graphic art. But strange things have been going on his Milwaukee Suburban town. Stories of dark strangers have surfaced, along with the mention of a glitch. But what does it all mean, and how is it all connected?
Karma Dog and the Cat Named Itchy Whiskers
Price: Free! Words: 1,850. Language: English. Published: April 22, 2018. Categories: Fiction » Humor & comedy » General
Short Story about the sibling rivalry between a cat and a Dog.
Steal This Free E Book
Series: Future Follies. Price: Free! Words: 2,830. Language: English. Published: April 12, 2018. Categories: Fiction » Humor & comedy » General, Essay » Technology
A short comedic collection of stories, essays and jokes about the future of writing and books
The Future of Drugs
Series: Future Follies. Price: $0.99 USD. Words: 5,180. Language: English. Published: April 8, 2018. Categories: Fiction » Humor & comedy » General, Fiction » Science fiction » Short stories
Collection of Science Fiction Jokes and Stories about Drugs.
Stupid Smartphones
Series: Future Follies ยท Stupid Smartphones. Price: Free! Words: 1,660. Language: English. Published: March 20, 2018. Categories: Fiction » Humor & comedy » General, Essay » Technology
(5.00 from 1 review)
Are Smartphones making us Dumber? Are Cellphones turning us into emotionless robots? These tough questions and others will not be answered in the following text. Instead, expect to find a small collection of comedy bits, jokes, an essay and a poem about how and why I hate smartphones (and stupid people).
The Book of Spells
Series: Road to Nowhere. Price: Free! Words: 9,870. Language: English. Published: March 9, 2018. Categories: Fiction » Humor & comedy » Black comedy, Fiction » Horror » Occult
The Sequel to THE WITCHES HAVE THEIR HOUR. Our young hero bribes a group of childhood misfits to embark on a weekend camping trip. But forgets to mention that this isn't an ordinary camping trip. The powers that be are after his rare books. And they will stop at nothing to take what they want no matter the cost. Will our hero and his ragtag friends be able to survive the weekend?
God's Sleeping on the Job
You set the price! Words: 1,540. Language: English. Published: February 24, 2018. Categories: Fiction » Religious, Fiction » Christian » Contemporary
The Business world gets Biblical in this short satire about Capitalism and the Christian World.
Red Cross Over Erie
Price: $1.99 USD. Words: 22,360. Language: English. Published: February 14, 2018. Categories: Fiction » Horror » Occult, Fiction » Fantasy » Dark
Liam is a timid boy about to spend the weekend with his Aunt Victoria, a member of the Elite living on the Islands in and around Sandusky Bay. However, this is no usual family outing, Liam must face his fears, and the decisions he makes will not only decide his fate but the fate of The Great Lakes.
The Witches Have Their Hour
Series: Road to Nowhere. Price: $0.99 USD. Words: 11,540. Language: English. Published: February 14, 2018. Categories: Fiction » Humor & comedy » Black comedy, Fiction » Horror » Occult
Comedy, Mystery and some horror I guess surround a small Wisconsin college town. And one student takes his final semester historical essay to seriously. But will our young hero be able to retain his sanity, or will the towns buried horrors destroy his innocence forever on his quest to get a A+?
Starlight Reflections
Price: Free! Words: 4,130. Language: American English. Published: January 26, 2018. Categories: Fiction » Poetry » American poetry
Collection of 28 Poems about the Universe, Love and the Human Experience.
Musical Poetics
You set the price! Words: 1,270. Language: American English. Published: June 27, 2014. Categories: Fiction » Poetry » Contemporary Poetry
1267 words, 12 poems Musical Poetics is a Poetry Chapbook that sees the world through the eyes of a musician.

Jordan Dumer's tag cloud

action fantasy    alchemy    american short story    ancient rome    antartica    bandits    black comedy    black plague    blogging    books    cats    cern    classic movies    classical guitar    comedy    comedy horror    comedy plays    computer virus    creepy pasta    crowley    crowley magick    crucifixtion    cyber punk    cyberterrorism    dark web    dating    death    detective fbi    detective noir    detective tale    dogs    drugs    epic poem    fantasy dark    free speech    ghost    god    hard boiled detective    historical horror    holy bible    horror    horror comedy    horror scifi    humor irony    i phones    iowa    jerusalem    jesus    jesus christ    jordan dumer    king solomon    knights    libraries    lucifer    magic    malta    man eating snowman    mediterranean sea    midevil    midwest    milwaukee    mississippi river    money    music    music and musicians    music artists    mystery    mystery horror    naughty santa    new york    occult horror    plague doctor    plains indians    poetry    poetry about writing    poetry and art    poetry book    quantum computer    romantic horror    rosecrucians    satire    science fiction    sharks    short story    smartphones    social media    spiritualism    stupid people    supercollider    technology    the night before christmas    the occult    trump    wealth    wendigo    western    white collar crime    wicca    wisconsin    witch comedy    witch doctor    witches    writing   

Jordan Dumer's favorite authors on Smashwords

Andre' Mwansa
Latest book: The Past Always Catches Up To You. Published July 10, 2018. (5.00 from 2 reviews)
Frankie Lassut
Latest book: Grant Goes Self-Employed. Published November 18, 2018.

Smashwords book reviews by Jordan Dumer