Simon Haynes

Biography

Simon Haynes is the author of five Hal Spacejock novels, two children's novels, a number of articles on writing and publishing, and several short stories.

Born in the UK and raised in the south of Spain, Simon emigrated to Australia with his family in 1983.

In the past Simon has managed to write one novel every two years. In 2012 he's already written five novels, with enough bits left over to make three more.

Where to find Simon Haynes online


Where to buy in print


Books

Hal Spacejock 7: Big Bang
By Simon Haynes
Price: $4.99 USD. Words: 83,720. Language: English. Published: April 7, 2014. Category: Fiction
A house clearance job sounds like easy money, but rising floodwaters, an unstable landscape and a surprise find are going to make life very difficult for Hal and Clunk. Hal Spacejock 07 Big Bang is book seven in the Hal Spacejock series.
Hal Spacejock 6: Safe Art
By Simon Haynes
Series: Hal Spacejock, Book 6 路 Hal Spacejock Universe. Price: $4.99 USD. Words: 70,020. Language: English. Published: May 20, 2013. Category: Fiction
(5.00 from 1 review)
A wealthy patron is sponsoring a series of art exhibitions, and Hal Spacejock has been employed to transport valuable pieces from one venue to the next. The only question is which of them will last longest ... Hal or the artworks? Safe Art is the sixth novel in the Hal Spacejock series (70,000 words, approx 300 pages) Simon Haynes also writes the Hal Junior series for readers aged 9-12
Hal Junior 3: The Gyris Mission
By Simon Haynes
Series: Hal Junior, Book 3 路 Hal Spacejock Universe. Price: $5.99 USD. Words: 32,860. Language: English. Published: September 17, 2012. Category: Fiction
(5.00 from 1 review)
Hal and Stinky are very excited about the camping trip to Planet Gyris ... imagine a whole week of fishing, swimming, sleeping in tents and running wild! Unfortunately, the boys crash land in the middle of a forest, and there's little chance of rescue. Is this the end of the camping trip ... or the start of a thrilling new adventure?
Hal Junior 2: The Missing Case
By Simon Haynes
Series: Hal Junior, Book 2 路 Hal Spacejock Universe. Price: $5.99 USD. Words: 31,330. Language: English. Published: September 5, 2012. Category: Fiction
The Missing Case is the second book in the Hal Junior Series. 32,000 words, 190 pages, 20 illustrations. With its funny illustrations, engaging characters and easy-to-read text, Hal Junior is ideal for reluctant readers. BOOK ONE will be available on Smashwords within the next 7 days.
Hal Spacejock (édition française)
By Simon Haynes
Series: Hal Spacejock Universe. Price: $4.99 USD. Words: 90,850. Language: French. Published: July 14, 2012. Category: Fiction
Ça n'ennuie pas Hal Spacejock de naviguer vers une étoile non répertoriée, de se poser sur un terrain désert, d'esquiver la douane et de charger un fret douteux sous le couvert de l'obscurité. C'est un jour de travail comme un autre. Non, la vraie bataille commence quand le client envoie un pilote vétuste prendre les commandes du vaisseau chéri de Hal...
Hal Spacejock 5: Baker's Dough
By Simon Haynes
Series: Hal Spacejock, Book 5 路 Hal Spacejock Universe. Price: $4.99 USD. Words: 62,840. Language: English. Published: July 5, 2012. Category: Fiction
(5.00 from 3 reviews)
Robots have a tough life in Hal Spacejock's universe: as second-class citizens they have no rights, and most are overworked, mistreated, and recycled at the drop of a hat. When Kim Baker, a wealthy industrialist, leaves his vast fortune to an elderly robot, it's front page news. Unfortunately, the robot hasn't been seen for decades ...
Collect Two
By Simon Haynes
Price: $2.99 USD. Words: 20,390. Language: English. Published: June 19, 2012. Category: Fiction
Collect Two contains the following stories by Hal Spacejock author Simon Haynes: Off Course, Billy's Book, Loss Leader, Fizz!, Thonn Day and Escape Clause. Total length is approximately 22,000 words.
Collect One
By Simon Haynes
Price: $2.99 USD. Words: 24,370. Language: English. Published: June 19, 2012. Category: Fiction
Collect One contains the following stories by Hal Spacejock author Simon Haynes: Sleight of Hand, The Desolator, Updown, A Piece of the Action, Catch of the Day and Yard Fail. Collect One contains approximately 25,000 words of fiction in six bite-sized pieces. Each title is also available separately.
No Reply (Short Story)
By Simon Haynes
Price: Free! Words: 3,120. Language: English. Published: June 19, 2012. Category: Fiction
(5.00 from 1 review)
Ben Hammond runs Wierd and Wild, a nightly radio show. There's $50,000 to be won, a prize for the first caller who can prove they had a UFO encounter. So far, the money has never been claimed ...
The Project (Short Story)
By Simon Haynes
Price: Free! Words: 2,070. Language: English. Published: June 19, 2012. Category: Fiction
(4.00 from 1 review)
Two scientists pull an all-nighter, desperate to complete their work before the project is terminated.
Fizz!!! (Short Story)
By Simon Haynes
Price: Free! Words: 2,290. Language: English. Published: June 19, 2012. Category: Fiction
Welcome to a future where long-distance travel involves nothing more than stepping into a booth. Unfortunately, for one man this tiny step is a giant barrier ...
Produit d'appel (Histoire courte)
By Simon Haynes
Price: $0.99 USD. Words: 10,450. Language: French. Published: January 14, 2012. Category: Fiction
Après des retards et des difficultés de dernière minute, le premier vaisseau de colonisation terrien quitte notre planète en direction d'une étoile éloignée. Accompagnez son équipage tandis qu'ils découvrent des apparences trompeuses...
Yard Fail (Short Story)
By Simon Haynes
Price: Free! Words: 3,030. Language: English. Published: November 16, 2011. Category: Fiction
When Ralph Swindon tinkers in his workshop, the whole world holds its breath ... A 2700-word short story. Trivia: Features the characters from Sleight of Hand.
Sleight of Hand (Short Story)
By Simon Haynes
Price: Free! Words: 2,380. Language: English. Published: November 16, 2011. Category: Fiction
After a cosy meal, the protagonist retires to his host's workshop for an after-dinner drink ... and becomes the unwitting subject of an experiment. Trivia: Sleight of Hand won the 2001 Aurealis Award for Horror.
Thonn Day (Short Story)
By Simon Haynes
Price: Free! Words: 2,670. Language: English. Published: November 16, 2011. Category: Fiction
Synopsis: Magick is banned in Thonn's world, outlawed after greedy and power-hungry wizards almost destroyed the entire planet. So imagine his surprise when he spies Eddie de Elder performing Magick spells! A 2500 word Fantasy/Comedy story
Updown (Short Story)
By Simon Haynes
Price: Free! Words: 1,740. Language: English. Published: November 16, 2011. Category: Fiction
Social services have come to take 10-year old Daniel away from his home and family, but his best friend Danny has other ideas ... A 1600 word Science Fiction story
Billy's Book (Short Story)
By Simon Haynes
Price: Free! Words: 5,050. Language: English. Published: November 16, 2011. Category: Fiction
Billy Crump is the local stable boy. Fed up with mucking out horses, he sneaks into the wizard's lab, concocts a potion using all the rare and expensive ingredients, and somehow ends up with a talking book. His first thought? Sell the book ... and say goodbye to horse muck forever! A 5000 word fantasy/comedy story
Off Course (Short Story)
By Simon Haynes
Price: Free! Words: 1,590. Language: English. Published: November 16, 2011. Category: Fiction
When you're on for a birdie, watch for aliens in the rough. A 1500 word SF/comedy/golf story
Escape Clause (Short Story)
By Simon Haynes
Price: Free! Words: 1,100. Language: English. Published: November 16, 2011. Category: Fiction
(3.00 from 1 review)
A mistreated worker decides to take matters into his own hands.
Catch of the Day (Short Story)
By Simon Haynes
Price: Free! Words: 3,850. Language: English. Published: November 14, 2011. Category: Fiction
Ken and Steve reluctantly give up their lawnmowing duties for a weekend of fishing, booze and male bonding. Unfortunately the fish aren't biting, supplies are running low and worst of all ... the beer just ran out. Then, without warning, an alien colony ship arrives in orbit, and that's when Ken's problems REALLY start. A 4000 word short story by the author of the Hal Spacejock series.
Hal Junior 1: The Secret Signal
By Simon Haynes
Series: Hal Junior, Book 1 路 Hal Spacejock Universe. Price: Free! Words: 28,080. Language: English. Published: September 18, 2011. Category: Fiction
(5.00 from 1 review)
Hal Junior lives aboard a futuristic space station. His mum is chief scientist, his dad cleans air filters and his best mate is Stephen 'Stinky' Binn. As for Hal ... he's a bit of a trouble magnet. He means well, but his wild schemes and crazy plans never turn out as expected! Hal Junior: The Secret Signal features mayhem and laughs, daring and intrigue ... plus a home-made space cannon!
Hal Spacejock 4: No Free Lunch
By Simon Haynes
Series: Hal Spacejock, Book 4 路 Hal Spacejock Universe. Price: $4.99 USD. Words: 93,420. Language: English. Published: September 18, 2011. Category: Fiction
Hal Spacejock is a loner, struggling to make his way in a huge, uncaring galaxy. His occasional brushes with the law have left him wary and suspicious of authority. The Peace Force is a proud and dedicated body of humans and robots who work together to solve crimes and keep the Galaxy safe. Now, one of them desperately needs the other.
Hal Spacejock 3: Just Desserts
By Simon Haynes
Series: Hal Spacejock, Book 3 路 Hal Spacejock Universe. Price: $4.99 USD. Words: 82,700. Language: English. Published: September 18, 2011. Category: Fiction
Planet Cathua has to go cap in hand to neighbouring systems, haggling and bartering for the very robots they used to be so famous for. One Cathuan patriot is determined to reverse this embarrassing situation. Trust Hal Spacejock to land in the middle of his sinister plot ...
Hal Spacejock 2: Second Course
By Simon Haynes
Series: Hal Spacejock, Book 2 路 Hal Spacejock Universe. Price: $4.99 USD. Words: 83,920. Language: English. Published: September 17, 2011. Category: Fiction
Rex Curtis is trying to save his freight company from bankruptcy, and the last thing he needs is a cheeky freelancer stealing his best customers. Hal Spacejock, cheeky freelancer, is fighting for survival in the cut-throat interstellar cargo business. The last thing he needs is a powerful enemy. Two headstrong men on a collision course, in a Galaxy barely room enough for one.
Hal Spacejock: Framed (A Short Story)
By Simon Haynes
Series: Hal Spacejock Universe. Price: $0.99 USD. Words: 8,750. Language: English. Published: August 27, 2011. Category: Fiction
(5.00 from 1 review)
A straightforward cargo delivery takes a left turn when Hal Spacejock gets sidetracked. But with 200 shares in a worthless company on offer, who wouldn't step into a makeshift teleporter which has already claimed one victim? Hal and Clunk, stars of the Hal Spacejock comedy series, feature in this brand new 8000-word short story. 'Framed' slots in any time after Second Course.
Hal Spacejock
By Simon Haynes
Series: Hal Spacejock, Book 1 路 Hal Spacejock Universe. Price: Free! Words: 82,530. Language: English. Published: August 19, 2011. Category: Fiction
(4.00 from 1 review)
Hal's an upright sort of guy, and he won't take jobs from gun runners, drug smugglers or politicians. On the other hand, the finance company's brutal enforcer is on his doorstep, and Hal has barely twenty-four hours to pay him off. Miss the deadline and he - and his ship - will go under. Way, way, under. Faced with an impossible choice, Hal chooses an impossible job ...
A Piece of the Action (Short Story)
By Simon Haynes
Price: Free! Words: 8,670. Language: English. Published: March 4, 2011. Category: Fiction
(4.00 from 1 review)
Flat broke and stranded in a South American country, Ralph Gardiner is nursing a beer and contemplating the wreckage of his life. No money, no prospects, and worst of all ... the beer is warm. When a local businessman approaches him with a curious job offer, Ralph decides he has very little to lose ... 8000 Word Short Story.
The Desolator (Short Story)
By Simon Haynes
Price: Free! Words: 5,610. Language: English. Published: March 4, 2011. Category: Fiction
Join Hurm, Runt and Father Mephistophiles as they struggle to save the hamlet of Yendour from a marauding dragon. Originally published in Andromeda Spaceways #6.
Loss Leader (Short Story)
By Simon Haynes
Price: Free! Words: 8,780. Language: English. Published: March 4, 2011. Category: Fiction
(4.00 from 1 review)
After many delays and last-minute setbacks, the first colony ship leaves planet Earth for a distant star. Join the crew as they discover all is not as it seems... Originally published in Andromeda Spaceways #3

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Smashwords book reviews by Simon Haynes

  • Opening Acts on Aug. 01, 2011
    (no rating)
    Thanks for the comment - the website has been fixed.