Big Kahuna

Biography

This is not porn. At first glance what I write may look like it, but it isn't. Porn is all about nailing babysitters. Eighteen-year old babysitters. Hot, busty, eighteen-year old virgin babysitters who happen to be sitting for attractive, older divorced men who also happen to be rich and powerful, and have 11-inch penises.

Give me a frickin' break.

My sexy science fiction isn't for everybody. It is for people who like to read. It is for the reader who appreciates the build up every bit as much as the payoff, as well as for those who enjoy irreverent, sometimes laugh out loud humor. The boobs may get a little big sometimes, but it's all in good fun.

So if you're ready to move on up to realistic characters, moving scenes, and lots and lots of dirty sex, give my stuff a try. I promise you won't be disappointed.

I also promise no babysitters. Not ever.

Companion art can be found at my DeviantArt page (http://bigkahuna69.deviantart.com): cover art for books in process, concept art, and just fooling around kind of stuff.

If you like my work, let me know (big_kahuna_69@yahoo.com). The same goes for typos, formatting problems, or other things that can detract from a good reading experience.

Thanks for reading, and don't forget to rate,

Kahuna

Where to find Big Kahuna online


Books

What Are Women For?
By
Price: $2.99 USD. Words: 9,920. Language: English. Published: January 1, 2014. Category: Fiction » Erotica » Comedy/Humor
Jeff's wife Janene is blonde and beautiful, but there's something that she flatly refuses to give him. Frustrated at being denied for so many years, he turns to his friend, Harry, a hypnotherapist who is willing to help Jeff in his quest for the ultimate hummer. Warning, this tale contains graphic depictions of oral sex, which as everyone knows is fun, healthy, and a great way to lose weight!
Ms. Paragon vs. Doctor Tits
By
Price: $3.99 USD. Words: 46,200. Language: American English. Published: February 24, 2013. Category: Fiction » Erotica » Comedy/Humor
(5.00 from 1 review)
Ms. Paragon, the world's greatest superheroine, has fought Nazis, slime monsters, and criminals beyond count. But she meets her match in Rex Titus, a mammary-obsessed plastic surgeon who has developed a radical new method of breast augmentation - and who intends that the buxom Amazon become his next patient! It's wits versus tits in what can only be described as a battle of epic proportions!
The Peripheral Cocksucker - Book III: Fembot U
By
Series: The Peripheral Cocksucker, Book 3. Price: $3.99 USD. Words: 62,760. Language: American English. Published: August 8, 2012. Category: Fiction » Erotica » Comedy/Humor
The third book in the trilogy finds Jake’s worst fears coming true when one of his fembots suffers a breakdown, new abilities manifest themselves, and psychotic behavior begins running rampant. But then who ever said cyborg ownership is easy?
The Peripheral Cocksucker - Book II: Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus, Fembots are from Mercury
By
Series: The Peripheral Cocksucker, Book 2. Price: $3.99 USD. Words: 56,130. Language: American English. Published: August 7, 2012. Category: Fiction » Erotica » Comedy/Humor
Can one man have too many fembots? Can he ever have enough? As Jake's inventory of robotic women grows, so too do his worries, what with fears of discovery (from within and without), concerns about programming conflicts and breakdowns, not to mention the very real possibility of getting a broken back from too much sex. It's enough to drive an evil genius crazy.
The Peripheral Cocksucker
By
Series: The Peripheral Cocksucker, Book 1. Price: Free! Words: 46,790. Language: American English. Published: August 7, 2012. Category: Fiction » Erotica » Comedy/Humor
(5.00 from 3 reviews)
Chicks are the ultimate storage devices. So Jake McBride has always believed, but when he accidentally turns his ditzy lab partner Robbi into the world's first fully programmable fembot, he discovers just how true that statement is. But as Jake explores the wonders of his fembotic girlfriend, he realizes too late that there's more to Robbi than on-demand lap dances. She's also a killer app!
Next Year's Model
By
Price: $3.99 USD. Words: 102,300. Language: English. Published: March 27, 2012. Category: Fiction » Erotica » General
(5.00 from 1 review)
Rod Wright loves two things: his canary yellow 1968 Pontiac GTO, and his gorgeous wife Yvette. But the distinction between them blurs when he invents a polymer that gives his bitchin' 'vette a dazzling showroom finish, turning her into a latex-coated nympho capable of going from 0 to 69 in 4.2 seconds flat. But there is a drawback - it's addictive. The ultimate romance novel for guys.
Bending Catherine
By
Price: $3.99 USD. Words: 39,450. Language: English. Published: January 8, 2012. Category: Fiction » Erotica » Lesbian Erotica
Hayley loves her roommate, Catherine. Who wouldn't? She's beautiful, funny, smart, and considerate. Her only fault is that she's straight. Worse still, she's driving Hayley to distraction and affecting her grades. Faced with the choice of leaving Catherine or losing her scholarship, Hayley comes up with a third option - turn Catherine into a lesbian. But that's impossible. Or is it?
Welcome to the Fish Tank: An Erotic Fairy Tale
By
Price: Free! Words: 11,140. Language: English. Published: May 20, 2011. Category: Fiction » Erotica » Literary Erotica
(3.50 from 4 reviews)
A young woman awakens to find herself trapped in the ultimate form of bondage - at the bottom of a giant aquarium, life-giving air piped in from above, her legs bound within a glittering mermaid's tail. Having no idea how she came to be in her watery prison, or why, Marina attempts to discover the identity of her unknown captor. But how do you communicate when you're thirty feet under water?

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